Tests and Strength…

Jesus was filled with the spirit when He was led to the desert to be tempted. A lot of times, people make the mistake of believing that if you’re being tempted, tested, or going through a storm that it’s because you’ve done something wrong or that God is punishing you. What some fail to realize is:

1. God does not bring you into or allow you to go through a situation that He is not fully prepared and willing to carry and supply you through.

Yes, Jesus was tested and this was a difficult time, but the Spirit also led Him and gave Him all the knowledge and strength He needed to pass the test. All Jesus needed to do was trust God was with Him through it all, and follow the Spirit’s promptings no matter how His body felt.

And

2. God brings you to and allows you to go through difficulties to solidify your faith in Him and to make you stronger.

If you can, think about a time when a friend of yours was there for you when you most needed them. They could’ve been there with advice, or comforting words, or simply a shoulder to cry on. Having them be there for you during that situation bonded you more with them, didn’t it? Going through that and having them there helped you to trust them more and believe that the next time you needed them, they’d be there for you in whatever capacity you might need. It’s the same with God, only infinitely better. God may not be visible, but His help is more real than anything any friend or person could ever offer you. Every time you turn to Him for help, He’s there for you. Countless times in the Bible, no matter what His people did, God would always respond to the cry of His people. No matter how many times they sinned or turned from Him, He always forgave and brought them out of their situations when they repented and asked Him for help. James 4:8 says “come near to God and He will come near to you.” Trust He’s there for you through the storm. And once you trust and He brings you through, you’ll find you’ve grown stronger in spirit and faith than you were at first.

If you listen to nothing else I ever tell you, please listen to this: God knows what’s good for you so much better than you think you know. No matter how much or little sense His plan may seem to you, trust without a shadow of a doubt that everything He does and allows is for your benefit and the furtherance of His kingdom.

Reading: Luke 4:-2

Transferable Faith…

 

I remember growing up as a child being raised by my two Christian parents. I remember thinking of how normal it was to see what they did that I only now realize was far from normal and was taken for granted all these years.

My parents depended on God for everything; for protection, for guidance, for provision, everything. And I never saw my parents without any of the things they asked God for. Looking back now, I’m remembering how it seemed like second-nature for them to immediately turn to God for anything they couldn’t work for or attain themselves, which, apparently when raising six children (and a guinea pig) on one pay check, is a lot. However, no matter how hard anything got, they never faltered in their faith.

During the holidays now, especially thanksgiving, my parents get all the family together and we reminisce about the years long past, about how God brought each and every one of us through difficulties, challenges, and attacks that none of us would have been able to bring ourselves through. We talked and even laughed about how each one of my parents’ children could’ve died at least three times between the time they were born and their 10^th or 15^th year of life. We’d sing together and talk about God’s goodness, and it would only be through these discussions that I’d come to find out how many difficulties my parents went through when I was just a tiny girl with ginormous dreams.

I remember seeing my parents sad, or upset, but not once in my entire life have I ever seen my parents give up faith on absolutely anything. This is one of the many attributes of their faith I’d taken for granted. They’d lived through difficulties that people would stress and cry about for years, but instead of losing faith, they believed and waited for God to do exactly what He said He would, and He always did.

As I got older, but still at a young age, my parent’s faith habits started to become my own. My relationship with God was started during those years and built off of a transferred faith I received from my parents; because they always had faith in God and received what they needed and asked for, it only made sense that I do the same, so I did. Now, as I look back and write this entry, I now have a clearer view of how precious and rare my parent’s faith was, and still is. So many people are living on little to no faith, resulting in a despair-filled life where they believe in God, but are unsure of His care or blessings or love or faithfulness in their lives. Much of that problem could be connected to the fact that they never had any role models or people in their lives that emulated the faith that Jesus had placed so much emphasis on during all of His teachings.

Jesus made a lot of bold statements about the effects of faith and what it can do for or in someone’s life. In Mark 11, He said,” Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them.” WOAH. That’s a level of faith that I find many people, including myself at times, are afraid of having. The question sometimes arises in some people’s minds,” What if I believe and I don’t get it? Does that mean God doesn’t love me?” or something along those lines. One must also keep in mind that the Bible says in James 4,” When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” And also in 1 John 5,” This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” Basically, the only reason God wouldn’t answer a prayer said in faith is because it’s going against His will for your life, or the prayer was said for worldly reasons.

I, now, consider myself extremely blessed to have had two faith-filled prayer warriors for parents, and that my life was built off of the only foundation that can never be moved, Jesus Christ. I now charge you, reader, with this: ask God to build a faith in you that when transferred or come into contact with others, it inspires them. The kind of faith that, when you raise your children, will place them on a solid foundation of belief in God. The kind of faith that looks crazy and stupid until God shows up and answers everything you’d asked for. The craziest forms of faith that are executed within Gods will are the most effective, not only for the person believing but also those watching.

Take this challenge with me to ask God to show you where there may be gaps or scarcities in your faith, and ask Him to help build and strengthen it so you’ll be ready and well-grounded when the winds and storms come.

I pray this message finds you well.

God bless.

Outpouring…

My Language has soured

My heart has gotten harder, my patience has worn thin.

But you, oh God, remain a strong tower.

You, oh Lord, remain my strength.

You lift me above every strong wind,

your right hand my guide, your words my encouragement.

You strengthen my heart in the dead of night,

and lift my eyes to the morning sun.

You, oh Lord, my God and Father, are my light and path,

my reason for being and moving.

You, oh Lord, my God and Supplier are my encouragement,

my heart’s closest friend.

 

You mend every wound and heal every damaged piece of my heart.

You, my Lord and Father, are the lover of my soul

and source for all my strength.

I will glorify your name in the dead of night,

I will shout your name in the temple for your name is great,

your words upholding the foundations of the world,

your love and passion burns within my chest.

Your power strongly poured out with every uttered word in my soul.

You lead and guide with a strong hand and loving heart.

 

Thank you, my God and Father, for being for me everything that I could ever need.

Thank you, my God and Protector, for guiding and leading my every step, strengthening me with your Spirit.

Tears…

Hear my cry, my God and Father,

My eyes are full of tears. 

With the pain and anguish in my heart,

My mind is weighed with fears. 
But you stay with me in the midnight hour

And speak and calm and heal,

That my days be long and my heart grow strong

And my mind refocus on your will.  

Anger like a plague tears through the streetsAs my chest sinks my heart beats 
Beats for the broken, the hurt, the shamed,

Beats for those who could never be named. 
Beats for the ones scared to speak

Beats for the ones killed before they peak
Beats for the hungry, the scared, the poor

Beats for the ones whose face hits the floor

As they call to the name that they hated the most

But the one whose name is written in the heavenly host
They cry and beg and barter and plead

And call for God ’till they get what they need. 
Then they turn and flaunt and strut and pretend

That there wasn’t an omnipotent being who saved them from their end. 
They blind themselves as they walk in their peace

Until life turns their happiness to pleas
Then they find their way back to the alter, the throne,

The one place that their souls truly feel at home. 
It’s the lucky, the blessed that find their rest there

The ones who stay with the one who names their ever hair. 
The ones who stay in God alone

The ones who know heaven, not this earth, is their home. 
They find their peace, tranquility, and joy

Find your peace, my friend, in God alone. 

Ascension

He ascended to the highest heights, then flew up even higher,He took our troubles from our hands, and saved us from the fire. 
He took the rags off of our backs, and replaced them with a crown,

He stands at our side, with His head held high, never to let us down
We have a God whose love and thought

Is to save from sin and death,

A love alone so greater than our own

That gives our every breath. 

Our life and love to Him we give to do with as He please,

To raise, grow, help His church,

And bring men to his knees. 
Our God above, His plan is not

To shame, or hate, or kill

His one desire is to share His hope,

His Love, His power, His will. 
We have a God who loves us most with every taken breath,

To protect and bless and love us all,

‘Till the moment of our death

Once Again…

Dear God,

Thank you for your love and grace and mercies. Thank you so much for all you’ve done and are doing in my life. Even when everything feels chaotic I still feel so grateful for everything you’ve done for me. Just the grace you’ve shown to me today is enough for me to praise you for the rest of my life.

Thank you for blessing and keeping me through everything. I’m so incredibly grateful, poppa, you’ve been so indescribably good to me. Thank you for loving me even when I act completely unlovable, bratty, childish, and self-centered.

Thank you for caring for me in ways I could never have thought of, much less ask for or even feel worthy enough to receive. Your grace, love, and kindness amazes me every single day. Your beauty and love confounds and encourages me every single moment to strive to be better and be a brighter light and encouragement in the lives of those around me. Thank you so much for giving me the abilities and opportunities needed to further your kingdom, serve your people, and grow my love for your body.

Dearest Father God, ,u heart and spirit are currently in an extremely painful state of stress and agony. The pain of everything that’s happening around me feels so incredibly out of control at times. Sometimes it all feels like so much…like I’ve dealt with all I could and that the next thing would break me. At times I already feel broken and I never know how to fix myself. I’m so used to constantly feeling lost and alone that at times I forget that I have this indescribably incredible Creator eagerly waiting with bated breath for me to give Him an opportunity to show their love once again through a prayer answered.

Thank you for always reminding me of your love and grace. Thank you, poppa, your so good to me, I don’t delve your love and yet you give it so freely. Thank you, Abba, for always showing me what absolute and true love feels like. Thank you for shining that light on me even when I feel as though I’m in the darkest of places.

Please help my emotions, Father. I don’t have fancy words or an incredible prayer, all I have is the brokenness and pain I feel and faith that you can and will help me with it so please poppa, please once again show you love, power, and grace in ,y life by answering this prayer again. I love you, poppa, and thank you so much in advance.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen xoxo

Irrevocable love…

Dearest Father in Heaven,

Thank you so incredibly much for everything; for who you are, what you’ve done, your incredible, unfailing love. Thank you so much for constantly proving who you are to me and what you can do. Thank you for loving me more than I could ever love myself. Thank you for always being there for me in ways I could never ask for.

     Your love is so dynamic and your mercies always new. Your grace comes with the morning and your beauty written on the stone of my heart.

     I love you, Lord. Because you first loved me.

     I never understood what that meant before. I always thought it was wrong to love someone just because they love you, but you proved to me that love is so much more powerful than a mere feeling.

     From youth I took my mothers words and believed every word that love is an action word. Love is physical proof of a spiritual burden to care for someone on a level that can never satiated. Love is the thing that builds up and breaks down and rearranges the very core of our beings Abba. You loved us to life. You loved us to salvation. Only the most perfect of loves can accomplish that. I see that now.

     I used to love you because my parents taught me to. I used to love simply because it had been a fact of my life since birth, that “God is good” and “God is love” and “we love Him because He first loved us” and that became an autopilot for me. I never fully understood it, but it always made sense in my heart so I followed it.

     And then I lived. I cried. I begged and bartered and learned and grew and travelled and saw and in everything I did, Lord, I saw your hand. In everything I saw I felt your blessing and love and infinite power. I saw and felt in the depths of my soul how you wrote yourself in all of existence. My chest swells at the thought of traces of your beauty weaved through our existence, into our very lives. You proved your love with the rising of the sun and the setting thereafter. You’ve proven your love by walking with me though every trial, tribulation, and sadness my heart found its way to and you loved me back to wholeness.

     God, you loved my brokenness away. You loved my fear away. You loved my regret away and with every breath I take I am reminded the life you loved me to, the life filled with gladness and friends. The life filled with proof of not only love but your existence. You’ve proven your love and power through the people you placed in my life. The incredible people you’ve given me to love and be loved by. The incredible people you buried my hope in.  

     Oh God, dearest Father in Heaven and my heart, thank you for your love. Thank you for proving your love daily why you and you alone are God, why there is no other but you. Why you and you alone hold my heart in the palm of your hand.

     I love you Lord, because you first took me from the depths of my own self-made despair and the traps I’d brought myself to. Because you took me in and cared for me and nursed me back to health. Because you called me your own before I even knew you. Because you not only loved, but gave and gave overabundantly. You gave me your peace, your love, your happiness, your strength. You gave me hope for tomorrow and constant assurance that the Blessed God I’ve come to fall deeply and irrevocably in love with is right with me, loving and caring for me in ways I could never dream of or earn.

     God, I love you because you first loved me.

Fire and faith…

“A great fire burns within me, but no one stops to warm themselves at it, and passers-by only see a wisp of smoke.”

Vincent Van Gogh

When I saw this quote, it instantly reminded me of faith in God’s promises. I’ve found that more often than not in my life, faith is an internal and constant decision that must be made whose external results are rarely ever noticed or applauded. Now I know what you might be thinking, Charis why in the world would you want your faith applauded? My answer is very simple: because it’s hard. 

Faith: noun, strong belief based on spiritual conviction rather than proof

We live in a physical world where we’re taught from day one to trust what you can see and not believe something or someone unless they have and provide you proof. Well Christianity is a faith-based religion which means that most of the time, you have to make an active decision to believe something with all your heart despite the lack of physical proof. 

Now don’t get me wrong, I believe there’s more than enough physical evidence to prove that God exists, but that’s just the first step of faith. The most important, of course, but only the first step. After that, faith becomes a lot harder to hold on to and frankly looks less and less appealing after a while. 

Fun fact about me, I’m a logic-based control freak. One of my favorite classes in high school was math. Why, you might ask? Because I always knew that no matter what the question, there is always a specific and definitive answer for it. Granted, there are some mathematical questions we don’t know the answer to yet, but I know the answer exists. It’s not based on opinion like English class or some parts of History, 2+2 will always equal 4.

Logic is my comfort zone. A lot of faith, however, depends on you not focusing on the logical, but the spiritual. It depends on how ready and willing you are to believe something God told you no matter how little physical proof there is. No matter how illogical it seems. 

Tim Ross, an incredible pastor, spoke at a retreat I went on this past August and he said something that really hit everyone that heard it. He basically said faith looks stupid when you’re walking in the middle of it, it’s only after you overcome doubt and insecurity and just push forward believing God’s words as He gave them that you receive your blessing and it no longer looks stupid. But you can’t wait until it makes sense to believe, that’s the exact opposite of what faith means. 
One of my most favorite biblical examples of faith is Noah. The dude literally built a ginormous boat in the middle of the desert because God told him to. I mean, honestly, it doesn’t get more stupid-looking than that. There are times when you can have faith in something and no one had to know you’re struggling with it, like health or a job, but with that? There’s no way to hide that level of faith. Everyone saw and made fun of him, heck if I was there I, in myself, would’ve made fun of him too! But he didn’t care because his faith outweighed his desire for logic. And look where it got him, he and his family were saved from a literal worldwide and earth-shattering flood. 

I believe that faith was Noah’s internal fire. But just like with Van Gogh, no one was warming themselves by it. In fact, people were laughing at it. But I think what we often fail to realize is the purpose of the fire. Who exactly is it for? If it was for everyone else, it would be more based on what people want to see and hear but it’s not, that fire needs to burn in spite of what people want to see and hear. 

I believe that fire is for God, and us, but mostly God. As our fires grow and burn on, no one ever stops to embrace it’s importance and sometimes it’s existence, but God stands by that fire and marvels at it. He sees it and all its beauty, imperfections included, but He warms Himself by it. The only thing Jesus ever marveled at in the bible was faith. Unwavering and unprecedented faith. He knew how important it was; faith is the lever that determines the amount of power and influence God can have in your life. The stronger your faith, the more incredibly He can move and make Himself known not only to you, but at times to those around you as well. God loves and honors that faith because it’s a result of your love, belief, and surrender in Him. The stronger your faith, the more it means you trust in God and only God, despite how things look on the outside. He created us to love Him, so it makes sense that He’d want us to express that love in any and every way available to us, including and especially in faith. 

Walls and Fires…

Jesus I’m frustrated. I always get frustrated when I see I’m not perfect. But instead of continuously holding on to that poisonous mindset, instead of embracing the frustration and focusing on it, I’m going to thank you. In all things give thanks. You told me to do that, right Poppa? So I will. Thank you, dear Heavenly Father, for this incredible opportunity for growth. Thank you for believing that I’m strong enough to pull through these storms and come out of this fire refined, strengthened, and unburned. Thank you for supplying me with the strength needed to do that Poppa. Thank you for you love. It’s because of that love that you don’t pull me out right now. Your love is so much deeper than my surface pain. It’s so much deeper than my crying to you because it’s hard, your love is so deep that you see beyond my current pain and you see it will be so worth it in the end Father. Thank you so much for loving me more than I could ever dream of loving myself. Thank you for seeing so far beyond what I could even fathom, and thank you for loving me perfectly Poppa. It means so much that you care enough to let me go through this, it means that you don’t just want me to be happy, you want me to be the best version of myself that I can be, which means as close to you in resemblance as possible. 

Forgive me Father for my constant inability to forgive myself. Forgive me for always placing unnatural expectations on myself that I always know I’ll fall short of. I always expect me to be my own god in the way that I can control my own life and be perfect in myself but that’s not the case. I have always and will always be imperfect. I have always and will always be too small to reach the heights I need to. I have always and will always be too weak to protect myself. That’s why I need you. That’s why I have you, Poppa. That’s why you love me so much, and that’s why I love you. Because you are my covering. You are my all, my Heavenly Father who sits on the throne constantly protecting and loving and pruning and preparing and using me. 

Thank you for entrusting me with the incredible honor of serving you, Father. I wouldn’t want to live my life any other way than this, always with you at the center of my heart, soul, spirit, and mind. 

Please continue to lead and guide me Father, continue to pour into me and change me to look more and more like you. Please help me to learn to forgive myself and not place any expectations on myself or others that you haven’t placed. 

Thank you Lord, I love you. 

Amen❤️